❗️Im sick of all the supposed "sexual" images that people have been discriminating on social media. Think about this rationally, you would see more flesh than this at a public swimming baths. The clothes I wear do not change the intentions of this picture, which is to explain my opinion and help people with eating disorders❗️ I never thought i would be living at double the weight i was 2 years ago, never mind loving it. And as if my eating disorder was trying to convince me that I needed to be at an even lower weight to be happy with my body. I am the living proof that anorexia was lying to me for all that time. Ps: I've stayed at my boyfriends for the past couple nights and I'm feeling a lot better, thank you for everyone that's been there for me as some of you know ive had a hard few days. But ive been coping really well with emotions and i will take my meds tonight now im home❤️
An apple a day keeps the doctor away 🍏🍎 Afternoon angels! 😇 I hope everyone has been having a great day so far! I was at the pool with my sister for a little over 2 hours and got so burnt on my shoulders ☄️ I went to shower 🚿 and all of a sudden it started to burn and I didn't realize until then that I was fried! 😅 Oh whale 🐳 I just finished this apple and it was so crunchy, I loved it! 🤙🏼I had a great time though 🙈 I love y'all bunches and will talk to you later! 💜⭐️😌 #mia#ana#boobsoverbones#eatingdisorderrecovery#eatingdisorder#anorexiarecovery#bulimiarecovery#ednos#edfam#edfighter
I'm feeling super self conscious today, I'm in town at 4 o clock which is when a lot of high school students and college students are around ect. Im on my own and I have my scars out. Im not going to lie and say its easy once you're recovered, because on hot days like this I walk around with my scars on show and I feel like the whole world is staring at me. But I don't let this set me back, I focus on the positives. Like hey, I'm on my own in public and getting buses here and there without having a mental breakdown. This time last year I was on a psychiatric ward with the same 4 walls around me 24/7. I didn't even leave the building because I was too ill. If I can get through those times in my life then I can survive a couple of dirty looks, right?
This is a hard photo to post as it shows my bloated tummy, healthier arms and legs. Therapy was tough today as it was also weigh day and as most of you know weigh days aren't fun 🙅🏼 I hadn't been weighed in 2 weeks so was extra anxious today - I gained and it was a big gain TW 1.3kg TWO it was hard, I just wanted to give up there and then. What's the point? Why am I still gaining when I lost 100g 2 weeks ago on the same meal plan? Am I eating to much fatty foods? All these thoughts whizzing around my head. I could have said to my therapist 'you know what I don't want to gain anymore weight so I want to stop here'. We got talking though and she asked me 'what are the pros of remaining in the anorexic weight range?' And for the first time I was lost for words as realistically what are the pros of staying anorexic? There aren't any. I'm going to continue fighting, she reassured me that she won't let my weight go out of control and I have made the decision to carry on and get to a weight where I am menstruating which was around 54kg for me last time I went through this process, I just have to trust the professionals and know they are helping me get my life back. I want to go on holiday this year, I want to visit my friends house that he's moving in to, go on adventures with my friends and just be free. I know I'm going to have to go through shitty days, horrendous body image and a whole new wardrobe but I'm not built to fit in to tiny clothes I'm 5ft 7 and have an athletic build due to the sport I use to play I need to start accepting myself and all my flaws. Im scared over what the next week will bring and how my body is going to start changing. I have a great family that will support me through the good and bad and I hope you guys will to! Enjoy the sunshine ☀️ & keep strong 💪🏻 •
Hi friends 🙋🏻🙋🏽♂️ I had a pretty decent day today 💘 I hung out at the pool for about 2 hours and that was loads of fun ☀️💧 Let me just say this, it was so hot (hotter than 116) but it was worth it cause I got a tan 🤷🏻♀️ Then I came back and watched movies with my sister and just relaxed since the sun drained us 👭🎞🍿 I may do a late night workout just so I can sleep good and I miss working out since it's been a few weeks 🏃🏽♀️I hope everyone had a nice day and don't forget to take it easy! It's very important in order for us to function properly. It's okay to have rest days 😉☝🏼 Please remember my DM is ALWAYS open! I know God put it on my heart to make this account so I wanna help as many people as possible so don't be afraid to reach out 💜 Much love everyone! 😇
Now, talk about something that gives you chills! I finished reading a memoir and when I read these sentences, I froze in shock and had to process what I just read. 🙄 This will forever be my new favorite paragraph in a book 👏🏼My friends, please take this to heart. 💜 It's not like we can start eating in a snap or stop purging overnight. It takes times, patience, and every bit in you to put an end to it. But sometimes, just sometimes, you reach a point where you have to make a choice. Would you rather die giving up..because I know I'd much rather realize that in the end I tried and fought. I hope God blesses you all and have a great day everyone! 💪🏼😻 #boobsoverbones#edrecovery#edfighter#ednos#miarecovery#mia#anorexiarecovery#anarecovery#ana#bulimiarecovery#recoveryinspo#foodforfuel#recoveryisworthit
Lets be honest guys, my legs have scars and bites and spots and patchy white bits and flabby bits. But its hot outside and if i want to have my legs out, i will fucking have my legs out. So should you💞
Buongiorno patati 🥔🍟
Come state? Io bene benissimo!! Ieri sera ho passato una bellissima serata con mamma, e mi sono anche aperta parlandone di cose che spesso tendo a tenere per me. Ma lei è proprio un'amica perciò mi sento libera di dirle tutto.👯 È bellissimo come il nostro rapporto sia migliorato nell'ultimo anno! Da quando ho 13 anni litigavamo ogni singolo giorno, ed ero arrivata a non vederla per una settimana intera 😣(nonostante le fosse a casa e non in viaggio..)
Ma ☝🏼 non pensiamoci ora!! Mi sono svegliata presto a causa dei pelosi 🐕 e mia mamma era già uscita 💼
Mi sono letteralmente tuffata 🌊 in questo pancake che mi ero preparata ieri 😻
••pancake al grano saraceno ripieno di yogurt 🍦 greco, e topping di albicocca 🍑 e burro di arachidi 🥜
LIBIDINE 🤤🚀 no comment davvero. Era buonissimo!! Lasciato in frigo la notte lo yogurt si compatta e diventa ancora più buono 😋
Oggi non ho piani particolari, alle 17.39 andrò in palestra m, ma altrimenti non ho piani per adesso! Devo di sicura farmi la ceretta 😭 perché l'estetista non ha posto.. se sentite urlare sappiate che sono io!! 🙋🏼
Buon lunedì tesori🌸
Day 27: Father's Day wandering! This is what it's about. This is why I'm trying so damn hard to push through the horrible times, fight every single thing thrown at me and why I accepted I needed to begin recovery, nearly a month a go! For days like this. Time with the people that matter! Doing things I love to do and having those care free moments when just having fun is the only focus. Knowing how much yesterday tired my mum out (she has a condition that causes her overwhelming fatigue and excruciating pain at the best of times but when she's done too much and not rested enough it's ultimately much more debilitating for her) and she'd be needing a long time in bed this morning I asked Pops if he'd like to explore the area a little and go for a wander. So we did! And it was wonderful. I didn't feel tired, or want to turn back round after 5 minutes and for the whole time we were out all that we focussed on was exploring and just having a laugh. We had to cut it short a little bit to get back for mum but I could have carried on for hours. Its the times like this that are the real therapy in recovery. The things that make you realise there's so much more to life than what your body looks like, what food you're eating, when you're eating it, exhausting yourself with hours of exercise and frankly being bullied by an ugly voice in your head and it's the things like this that make you want to beat it away and ultimately stop it for good. Don't get my wrong I have a hell of a long way to go but this just makes me more determined to do it! This morning/afternoon I felt some of the old me, the REAL me, coming out again. I'm going to get her back, slowly but surely! #recovery#recoveryisworthit#recoverynotrelapse#edrecovery#anarecovery#prorecovery#adultswitheds#anorexia#anarecovery#realrecovery#minniemaud#relax#walk#happy#family#edfam#edwarrior#edsoldier#summer#healthy#healthynotskinny#boobsoverbones#balance#holiday#balancednotclean#life
Here's the truth about dressing rooms: Everybody hates them. They make you sweaty and you feel fat and disgusting when you try clothes that are too small. They lower your self esteem when you catch a glance of your back in the mirror. I tried on these jeans and realised that the size 12 didn't fit me, so feeling quite shameful i went to get a size 14 from the rack. I didn't buy half the clothes i tried on, but the ones i did buy make me feel amazing. I got home and put the jeans on and felt good despite knowing the number on the label. It may make you feel like shit when you have to go back to get a bigger/smaller size. But only you will know that number and when you wear the clothes that fit, no matter what the size, you will look beautiful. Ive been convincing myself that my pre-ed clothes still fit, that i don't have to buy bigger sizes. But really, come on Mia, they're well too small and you need to treat yourself to a new wardrobe. So i did and i feel great, no regrets. A number will not define me, but a set of new nice clothes will make me feel like me.
Hey everyoneee💁🏼as its sat-fat Friday, thought i'd treat myself to chips and curry and pie cause why not👌🏻I promise you I eat balanced😂tomorrow may also be a sat-fat Saturday, and then maybe a sat-fat Sunday ect. My eating disorder is long gone, bye bai👋🏻
Today's been hella stressful! Went to Tesco with my sisters to do part of the food shop while my parents were at work - which was fine but when I got home I had received a letter from ESA saying my sick note had run out - it doesn't run out until August and I sent it off on the 8th. So I spent lunch time on the phone to them trying to get it sorted...then I received a text about an hour/2 hours later saying they have received my sick note and the money will be paid into my account 😅 so in the end it was just a case of our letters crossing over in the post but thankfully it's a positive ending, still waiting for my Hc2 form to come back though which is taking ages 🙃 lunch was my usual chicken salad sandwich, muller rice and orange juice, 🍊 snack was a twirl 🍫 and apple juice 🍎 and tea I kid you not was the one of the nicest things I've ever had. It was BBQ pulled beef on a wholemeal roll and it was so good😩😍 had new potatoes alongside this as carbs are good 🙄👍🏻 said to mum I need to start challenging myself again as I'm sticking with the same breakfast, the same snacks, 2 of the same lunches and then my carbs are tea time don't vary much so that needs to be changed 👍🏻 any suggestions of what I can buy please suggest/comment or DM me 😄 hope you're all okay! The weather has been gorgeous today☀️☀️☀️ #ana#anxiety#anorexia#anorexic#anarecovery#anorexiarecovery#ed#edfamily#edwarrior#eatingout#eatittobeatit#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorderrecovery#recovery#recoveryisworthit#weightgain#weightrestored#boobsoverbones#bodyimage#balancednotclean#foodisfuel#strongnotskinny
I owe you guys an update//ptw-
Tomorrow marks 2 years since the worst day of my life, the day that changed everything. I woke up imagining it to be any other day, I didn't realise exactly how ill I was. I went to a&e that day and had no idea that i wouln't see my home for another 10 months, I had no idea that those 10 months and onwards would be the most traumatic times of my life. Now, two years on, the memories of each day haunt me and terror me. As the anniversary is tomorrow, my flashbacks are even more vivid and terrifying. I got sent home from school today after another psychotic episode and I'm finding it really hard to manage with negative thoughts. I'm sorry that I'm not in a great state of mind right now to be positive, though I hope I'm feeling better after tomorrow passes. Im going to keep occupied and distracted for now💞love you all!
So yeah I'm losing at being thin, but hell, I'm winning at living. My jeans are too tight, my legs are touching: but instead of wearing baggy jeans whilst walking down a hospital corridor, I'm wearing tight jeans and I'm dancing to my favourite music. Is it really YOU wishing to win to anorexia? I thought it was all I wanted at one point. But you need to ask yourself where you'd rather be, and yeah you may have an okay day or so whilst in a relapse but trust me, even the WORSE days in recovery will be better. So if you're in costa or starbucks, do me a favour and look at the name of the drink rather than the number which follows it. Your head may bully you, but with each sip you take you bully that bitch
Buon pomeriggio!! 🌞
Come state? Io bien bien
Ormai sapete cosa ho fatto questa mattina dato che ho documentato tutto sulle stories 🎥😂 MA ☝🏼 sono anche riuscita ad andare in palestra 🏋🏻♀️ Ho solo fatto una mezzoretta, perché ho deciso di suddividere l'allenamento tra oggi e domani 🌸
Sono andata verso le 12.45 sperando la gente fosse a mangiare, e invece nooo devono riempire la palestra anche all'ora di pranzo 😒🖕🏼
Comunque, questo piatto non vi mette tantissima allegria ?!😍🌷☀️ A me siii hahahah e soprattutto mi ricorda una certa personcina spicy 🌶💗
••riso basmati 🍚, verdure al forno 🥕🌱 e filetto di salmone, cotto a puntino 👌🏼
Tutto condito con olio, salsa di soia 🤤 e qualche fogliolina di basilico 🌿♥️
Cosa farete nel pomeriggio? Io vado appunto a casa del bro a portare i piatti anche se lui non c'è 😭 perché è in viaggio di laurea 👨🏼🎓ma lo rivedrò domani sera!
Vi mando un bacio enorme che arriva da qui 🇬🇧 a lì 🇮🇹🌍